You dreamed of seeing me up there,
Alas, I never made it;
I moved beyond, to other things,
And your hopes slowly faded
Oh yes, you had so many plans
For this fly in the ointment:
I was a minor talent, but
A major disappointment
You dreamed of seeing me up there,
Alas, I never made it;
I moved beyond, to other things,
And your hopes slowly faded
Oh yes, you had so many plans
For this fly in the ointment:
I was a minor talent, but
A major disappointment
My long best friend and nemesis
Whom I have loved for many years –
But who a fickle heart displays
To tease me as she does —
Through long depression, years of hurt,
She’d touch me when I would touch her;
And I would like to think that, still,
It is the way it ever was
The decades go, my long best friend:
The tunes we think will never end
They leave our fingers and our ears
And melt into the wilting years
And loyalty goes unremarked
Until at last, it all goes
Dark
The best advice I’ve never given?
I think that would be
To learn to play an instrument –
Piano, t’was for me –
I practiced in my lonely teens
When life was naught but questions;
Which only then intensified
When I quit taking lessons
As a young college student. I
Would would play by note or ear
Each piece or song that spoke to me
I might happen to hear.
Which came in handy later, when
‘Round about twenty-five
I grew ill and was home alone;
I could at least contrive
To still play music, even though
I, thrombocytopenic*
Could barely move my fingers which
Had grown rather arthritic
But still the music brought some peace
And helped me as I healed –
When I rejoined the human race
From where I’d been concealed
I got back into playing places
I’d not been before;
And met new people, made new friends
And played, and played some more —
But never once did anybody
Say with true intent:
“I sure regret my learning how
To play an instrument”
They rather mostly envied me
What they just saw as talents:
But music had been more than that
It gave my life some balance.
I don’t tell kids or adults that
They all should learn to play:
From what I know of life
They wouldn’t listen anyway —
For loneliness and love of music
Drove me to excel:
What you don’t have the passion for
You never can do well
But music’s never let me down
But has me oft enchanted:
I pray I’ll always love it, and
Never
Take It
For granted
= = = = =
* Thrombocytopenia – extremely low platelet count, in my case due to lupus.
(.)