I once loved a woman much smarter than me,
And also a better musician;
She had a quick wit, and a good turn of phrase,
Plus one healthy share of ambition.
I know while she’s richer than Midas these days,
Her talents remain, unabated:
Yet she has a spot in her heart still for me,
That idiot that
She once dated
She wrote often on intimate subjects;
He obsessed often about them.
So, to his mind,
They were perfect for each other.
And she lived in the very same city!
So, he contrived to meet her;
Fascinated with this beautiful woman
Who wrote so passionately about
Enjoying physical relations with men —
Sex without relationships.
So, he did meet her.
She was polite, but, most definitely,
He was confused and angry.
How could this be?
Oh, my poor unfortunate friend:
Just because she enjoys dating men,
Doesn’t mean she wants to be with you;
And “Sex without relationships”
Doesn’t mean “Sex with people
You aren’t attracted to.”
The moral of the story
For heterosexual guys looking for
Sex without relationships
Is as follows.
Welcome to the 21st century!
It is all yours.
It probably was ever thus.
Life can really suck.
Of course, you COULD
Look for an actual relationship
With a woman
Not based solely on sex.
There is even a rumor out there
The sex in an actual relationship
Is considerably more satisfying.
I wanted to seduce her with my wit;
She started laughing at my clumsiness.
I thought, “I’ll let my style do the bit” –
Then knocked over the wine, and made a mess
She came towards me with a yellow towel,
And I no more my laughter could abate:
Then her eyes shone when I laughed at myself
And I had done enough
For a first
(“A Dating Memory” – 7-5-2015)
The last kiss that we had was by my car,
Two nights after our most romantic night.
My first true love became my first big scar;
We broke up without so much as a fight.
She was away at school where she then met
A guy; and love had forced her to admit
That his was love like none she’d known as yet.
So she hung up the phone. And that was it.
I sat there brooding, my father inquired;
I told him why I looked so out of whack.
He said, “At least she was honest with you.
And not cheating on you behind your back.”
I sat there shameful, for I didn’t know
He known of my dalliance all this while:
I felt my foolish anger start to go,
My frown of rage became a sheepish smile.
He said, “My son, now that’s an honest girl.
She treated you with honor, not with stings;
I hope one day, as you go through this world
You will prove yourself worthy of such things.”
Oh worthy I was not – not at that age.
For I was fickle, false and just a mess.
My first real breakup hurt only my pride
The love had died by my own selfishness
Singles get unsought advice
Offered to them, gratis —
Yet at last, we are the same
Regardless of status
Patronizing says you think
What you know is greater:
Still, we’ve each but our own lives
And so, don’t be
that day, perfect,
scent of roses,
leaves a carpet,
she in pink, and i
in the park,
a light breeze blowing,
words all heard, and
bits of smile,
hands first touching,
soft and glowing,
dogs out watching,
trees all knowing
what’s to come and
what’s to be,
that day, stillness,
universe on us
all seemed joyful,
studying the leaves
in the park expanse
first respect and
still i see —
times you feel
i wish you loved me
not you, too
what is so bad with saying “love”?
it isn’t what you say, it’s how
you say it. love’s not ownership.
it is a song, a thunderstorm,
a breeze. it’s not a thing at all.
but still i wish you loved me
yes, you do
We watched the clouds roll in that day
Cross-legged in the sand;
We heard the distant thunder
Sitting huddled, hand-in-hand –
Until the rain was on us,
Then we kissed and up we rose;
Ran in the rain to my place
Where we shed our sodden clothes –
Before, we’d been “long-distance”,
So then this weekend was it —
We’d spend the time together, and
See just how well we fit –
The waves were high and crashing
In the sea right near my place;
I felt her warm breath on me
As I touched her still-wet face –
Beneath the raging skies we burned
And boiled, desperately —
And on-and-off, back on again
And oh, we tried, with all we had,
Our demons to outrun:
The storm was all around us, though –
In far more ways
[Alternately titled “Remembering My First Real… Long-Distance Relationship”]
So up we went
To a sky that nearly swallowed us –
A bass line could be heard across
The vast expanse of people –
Smells of sugar and salt and butter and
A bit of your perfume
I still can smell —
Two holding hands and feeling high
In several different ways –
We laughed to feel the wind and all
The myriad sensations of the evening –
Clad in our respect for dating, and
Our devotion to the cause of discovering
Just how high and how far and how fast
We could go
And not really on a date, but only sort of