Mannequin Depressive

she stands in a long slow line at the grocery store
looking at magazine covers
where fabulous actresses and fitness models
in all their airbrushed glory
gaze out at her vacuously

and she looks sadly at her cart
which is both kale- and tofu-deficient
and thinks she could stand to lose a couple of pounds

an aging actress
currently to be seen on one of those magazine covers
who has been dating a 24-year-old airheaded man-bimbo
is waiting in an equally long line
to get lip injections

while her man-bimbo
is having sex with her personal assistant

(Originally published July, 2014)

The Image Files

She never thought this life would be for her.
And she’s not sure about it, even now:
Twixt what we earn, and what we watch occur,
There’s much to figure out, and plumb, somehow —

She barely eats, she shows up for the shoots,
She passive waits for makeup, hair, and clothes;
The checks all clear, though, and she works as suits
Her preference for layouts or for shows —

And men are plenty; they’re most everywhere,
But guys she meets, they never quite connect:
And she keeps busy, flying here and there,
Just like tonight – as she stands there, bedecked,

She thinks, “It’s what I dreamed of, fervently,
But is this really where I want to be?…”

Katya (2)

Katya (2)

She is an honest model in
That world of vain display –
Made up to pose for pictures
Off in Paris or Calais

She’s treated like a cufflink
By the men she sometimes dates;
Rich guys who she makes look good
Like their Benz’s or estates

She wants real love and passion,
Not to be some work of art:
My fear is that she’ll settle
For all money and no heart

Because she think that’s normal
For the people in her biz;
She’s trapped inside the limits
Of who she’s long thought
She is

Katya (1)

Katya (1)

From earliest of memory
Was told that she was ‘pretty’;
But never ‘strong’ or ‘smart’ or ‘bold’
Or anything like ‘witty’

And yet, the truth – she’s all these things.
But she may never know:
She’s felt, as long as she could feel
That she’s just there
For show

A Few of Her Words…

Body Image

“I’ve worked as a model for years:
And I’ve been grateful for the money.
I needed it to get through school, and
It’s helped a lot the years right after.

I’ve known girls who envied me for my
‘Good looks’, but
Believe me, it is no panacea.

It makes you a target
For men who like to collect
Trophies, and

It makes you hated by some women
Who don’t even know you.

People talk to me like I’m stupid,

And men have treated me like a cuff-link.

Part of me fears that,
The day my looks start to go,
There will be no ‘me’ anymore:
That all I am
Is a ‘thing’…

Some ‘thing’

For other people

To look at”


Some people loathe the way they look,
The sound of their own voice:
And dream of worlds in which such things
Are more matters of choice

But while we can change many things,
It’s unwise to pretend
That we are different than we are,
It does not well portend –

For we can’t hide our substance, merely
With a new format:
No more than baldness can be hidden
Just wearing
A hat

Photo on 1-28-16 at 5.10 AM