Other People's Feelings
I once believed in happiness
Before the pain set in;
I once believed that love and hope
Were there to lose, or win
I once believed the old, old songs
About love strong and true:
I once believed in many things
When I believed
In you
(“I Once Believed” – 10-8-2014)
I've learned one piece of truth Within my old, benighted niche: If ignorance was currency, We'd all be very rich. For people traffic in it, daily, Proudly, even so -- The more they talk or type it seems The less they need to know. But self awareness is a very Scarce commodity In times when just reflecting is A noted oddity. A thing that's oft repeated Isn't thereby proven true; But if being an echo is The thing you want to do, Then welcome to today. You'll fit in fast, And be surprised, How when you say the slogans, You are taken as Quite wise
doors unlocked, grills turned on, salads cut, ice unpacked, tables wiped, clock is punched, fish brought in, dishes stacked people out in the walk, signs we once again might thrive -- cafe morning, now they're here, good to see the street alive
A broken heart's not photographed; A shattered hope, not photoshopped -- There's dreams that die before they're born, And others, only lately stopped -- But in the silence, and the dust, The sun kicks up, with its first rays, A memory, like an iron weight -- But who would notice Nowadays?
She first escaped at twenty-three. A bicycle, a battered van, A life that she could taste, because She sampled it, at her own pace and where. She felt the wind upon her neck, And her own tongue within her mouth, The ache of stretching, working limbs That carried her the whither she would go. A weathered book of Kierkegaard, A necklace made of icy gold, And one September when she had No answers, nor desire to provide them. And who was I? Just one regret. A place she’d traveled to, and cried; A type of warning of the life She’d never settle for in place of freedom. So, now there is a woman grown, Who owns a bicycle no more, Who’s seen her own two daughters go And wanted to impart this gift, this lesson — But cannot find the proper words To speak of strength in time alone That do not sound like hectoring Or lessons quaint and from an era gone... For night means nothing If you’ve missed the day; And love is only possible If you have your own self To give Away
There's those who stand in judgment Of everything that's past From platforms made of rectitude And stones so bravely cast Towards a time, now silent, That can't defend its ways; But maybe it's been ever so. I know it's so, these days -- What wasn't, can't be talked about. And now, what isn't thought Is human commonality: How even our best is fraught With good intentions, soon to be Destroyed by future mavens, Reducing us to categories From cloistered online havens When what were was so much more: To suffer, in the end, Reductionism's careless way Of killing us Again
To tell the story of a life Takes many pages, many words; To tell the story of a love Takes every bit as long The you I saw in summer fields Beneath an endless weightless sky The you I felt in tenderness The softness of your skin, a sigh For now, when I remember you There is a novel in my mind; The beauty of your memory Is always young, and brave, and kind There's beauty in the world, I know, But I thought I had lost it then: You walked into the room, and I Became the mindfulest of men But this - this was not me at all This was all you, and love; it was A type of wakeful dreaming where I did not want to wake, because Your magic was in everything. If ever a man loved, I did: I cherished every moment, and I lay awake at night and bid The minutes slow their very march. To lengthen time, our time, so much As possible; to see your eyes To stroke your hair, to softly touch Your skin beneath your summer dress. To love you there with all my heart; Your words of warning in my ears That love is short and lovers part. A life, my life, what is it now? It's just a cold and fading fire A soon forgotten flickering Of what was once raging desire And all for you, my long true love - Who taught me wonder in the night, Whose hand I took to cross the bridge Of leaving off and doing right The day is closing in, and I Put down my pen, and rest a while - For now, when I remember you I shiver once, and lastly Smile
(“Now, When I Remember You” – 6-25-2015)
she lost her seeing out in yards of grief the feeling of the trees their whispers known to younger her lost like full inhalations of the smell of dewy grass that slid under carelessly dirty shoes on feet that walked without carrying phantoms no longer seeing
Oh, my love, the world goes by, The night nears gone, the day draws nigh, And I am wandering alone — In a speeding blur, in my seat alone. Oh, my love, there’s a certain buzz, Like a great beyond, or the big because: Where discovery’s not a fearful thing, And words are more feeling than parroting. For the world won’t stop for mistakes I’ve made: The moments of anger, or words that lied — All the tickets punched are the price I’ve paid, Like the seat to my right that’s unoccupied — Oh, my love, if you hear me now, Know I’m trying my best to be who you thought I could be in the days when the world seemed slow, And acceptance was found where it wasn’t sought, And we could control where we meant to go — Oh my love, my love, I still wish It was so
