At age thirteen, not much makes sense, so the young heart clings to traditions, where meaning is felt, and does not therefore need to be explained.
Often, all the adults see is the confusion, which manifests itself in discontent and anger, and not the clinging, or the searching, or the questions, most of which are unexpressed, and indeed, are inexpressible. But around traditions, people can unite, even if none of them are aware that is what is going on. Because family is very often what happens when nobody is paying attention.
Singing around a piano. Old songs and new. Parents & siblings, melody & harmony, lights & wrapped gifts, hopes & worries, all unknown to each other. At age thirteen, not much makes sense, but traditions help, because emotions are labyrinths, and secrets are like canyons. But music, like other shared things, can say everything you need, often without trying to say any particular thing.