Mannequin Depressive

she stands in a long slow line at the grocery store
looking at magazine covers
where fabulous actresses and fitness models
in all their airbrushed glory
gaze out at her vacuously

and she looks sadly at her cart
which is both kale- and tofu-deficient
and thinks she could stand to lose a couple of pounds

meanwhile
an aging actress
currently to be seen on one of those magazine covers
who has been dating a 24-year-old airheaded man-bimbo
is waiting in an equally long line
to get lip injections

while her man-bimbo
is having sex with her personal assistant


(Originally published July, 2014)

The Mathematics of Body Image Comparisons

In formula form, for your convenience. Remember, I am a professional mathematician, so don’t try this at home or anywhere else. You may not even want to try it here, it’s up to you.

I’ll put it down in formulas

We all want to be sexy:

You’ll never be as X as Y

And why? Y is

More X-ey

Girls in Bathing Suits

I grew up down in Florida,
It’s hot, and often clear,
And girls will wear their bathing suits
About six months a year

It’s funny about bodies, for
We all have heard the hype;
But fewer men than women
Will approach the ideal type

A fact that wasn’t lost on me
When I was just a teen;
I was a “three” upon a scale
Of “ten” to “best unseen”

Not so, the many girls I knew:
For long summer’s duration,
They served as subjects of
My constant carnal admiration

They drove us boys to madness,
Whence, a few did not return;
The sunshines’s hot in Florida,
But it’s the girls
That burn

A Few of Her Words…

Body Image

“I’ve worked as a model for years:
And I’ve been grateful for the money.
I needed it to get through school, and
It’s helped a lot the years right after.

I’ve known girls who envied me for my
‘Good looks’, but
Believe me, it is no panacea.

It makes you a target
For men who like to collect
Trophies, and

It makes you hated by some women
Who don’t even know you.

People talk to me like I’m stupid,

And men have treated me like a cuff-link.

Part of me fears that,
The day my looks start to go,
There will be no ‘me’ anymore:
That all I am
Is a ‘thing’…

Some ‘thing’

For other people

To look at”

Natureality

And now, a word from some sponsors. Of what, I’m not sure.

Make your skin look different than it looks;
Make your body different than it’s made —
Chase the image offered to you here,
Spend your money on the latest shade

Never think that you might be okay;
Never grasp that you have made the grade —
Make your skin look different than it looks,
Never stop and think
You’re being
Played