The Weight of Holidays

It’s not the cold and lonely, it’s
The memory of

The warm

The holiday season has started in this country, and it brings with it an emotional weight, a gravity, akin (in the physical world) to that of a neutron star. It typically pulls us in, be it for joy, or sadness.

Many of the traditions associated with these days made the world seem magical as children, so we look to feel it again. But the magic and the wonder have become associated with people, some of whom we lost along the way.

It can be a season of tears. Unlike many other men in the society I live in, I have no problem crying. Tears come to my eyes with a fair degree of frequency. Music is their most frequent trigger, although guilt has been giving music some competition recently.

Loneliness is often intensified by the holidays, but so is almost every other feeling. We laugh, we wince, we clap back, and yes, we cry a little more easily in this season.

I realize now, looking back, how hard my parents worked to make the holidays special for us. I realize too, a little sadly, that I might not have left my own children quite as meaningful a legacy. When you blend two families into one, one of the dangers is that traditions get watered down.

Still, many more deal with much greater sorrows during the holidays. So it’s not just a time to give gifts or money to others, it’s a time to reach out to those who you know might be struggling.

I am somewhat introverted in real life, and I’m uncomfortable at parties. I’ve always tended to be drawn to the loneliest people at gatherings, frequently spending my entire time talking with them. Maybe that’s because I myself have been that person.

So be gentle with yourself, as well as others, in these upcoming days.

And remember that it was and will always be love that makes whatever magic there is.

Picture credit : ID 22665349 © Alexandragl |

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