Original Poems

The Raging Narcissist Award

I’m beyond thrilled to be nominated
Beyond thrilled, I say

Actually, I’ve never been past “thrilled”
I’m not entirely sure what I would find there
Come to think of it
I think I last got as far as “thrilled” a couple of months ago
And I wasn’t that chuffed about it

I would like to thank Beleaguered Servant
Over at his other blog
For nominating me
Thanks, buddy
This came as a real surprise

I wonder if acting like two blogs
Are actually separate entities
Makes me into more than one person in real life?
Since I use a pseudonym,
Doesn’t that make already make me
Officially multiple people?

I hope to prove worthy of this award
In fact, I think I can say with some confidence
That few people deserve this more than I do

Yes, and if there was an
“Insufferable Jerk” award
You could win that,
And sit here hour on hour
Having self-congratulatory orgasms

I am supposed to pass the
Raging Narcissist Award
On to someone else
But if I did
I would hardly
Have deserved it in the first place,
Right?

You raise a valid point there, Owen
Perhaps you should just say your thanks
And get off the stage

Thanks again everyone
Remember, there would be
No narcissists without other people
To give insufficient attention to

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