The Mathematics of Body Image Comparisons

In formula form, for your convenience. Remember, I am a professional mathematician, so don't try this at home or anywhere else. You may not even want to try it here, it's up to you.

Clara

Clara dreamed of being Something other than a buffalo, Maybe even living In the tropics, in a bungalow, Wearing cocoa-lotion, Dressed in sandals by the sea — Clara was a bison, but An awful lot like me. Clara lived in splendor Mid the snowing on a mountainside, Perfectly in freedom, and Quite cozy in her … Continue reading "Clara"

Thanksgiving, the Unknown Story

Thanksgiving is a holiday celebrated in the United States And where we share the traditional slices of pizza With passers-by in a spirit of goodwill Engendered by the grateful good spirits created by our political process And where celebrate our gratitude through Our wholesale appropriation of the food of other cultures, And music for that … Continue reading "Thanksgiving, the Unknown Story"

The Planet’s Most Exclusive Club…

Consists of only dancers. The rest of us, each geek or schlubb May ask, but get no answers I cannot dance, and that’s a fact: You’d know it just once seeing — Since I cannot, I know I am A lesser human being