Love Spasm The Third

When my ex left, our youngest was
But three years old – alas –
So I would take him daily to
A little pre-k class

The girl who worked there was so young
But seemed to like the way
I’d sit with him – and other kids –
Beginning every day

So, finally, I asked her out
And she said that she would
So I drove out to get her
When she said it would be good

And she came out to meet me
Well before I’d left my car;
And it struck me, so I asked her
Before I had gone too far

Exactly just how old she was
“Um, twenty” – her head hung —
She looked up, her eyes pleading
Asking if that was too young

“Oh, no, no – you’re age suits you”
That was all I thought to say
But I knew I wouldn’t go on
Any further in this way

So post-dinner, I told her
Gently, how much fun I had
And then I took her back home
To her mother and her dad

And said, “I will not lie to you:
I will not call again,
But if I may, I’d like to say
To you now, as a friend:

You’re beautiful and charming,
And if ages weren’t in play,
I’d probably want to call you
From the end of the driveway.”

But she was not placated
As we both felt something strike:
The pain of liking someone
Who it is
Just wrong
To like

Author: Beleaguered Servant

Owen "Beleaguered" Servant (a/k/a Sibelius Russell) writes poetry mostly, with an occasional pause to have a seizure.

26 thoughts on “Love Spasm The Third”

    1. It hurt at the time, because I liked her, and my emotions about her were entirely confused. My male friends were split about 50/50 into the “you did the right thing” and the “you were insane to pass that up” schools of thought – if you can call what the second category of people were doing “thought”.

      Liked by 3 people

      1. It is complicated, isn’t it? On the one hand, age shouldn’t matter. On the other hand, it does.

        For what it’s worth, I understand why you walked away, but I could also *literally* feel the pain it caused you to do so.

        Liked by 3 people

    1. Thank you for your comments. Doing the right thing can hurt, although, to be fair, it hasn’t happened to me that often.

      Liked by 2 people

  1. Aww it’s so sad that societal pressure makes it uncouth to have relations with someone who is perceived to be “too young” or “too old” when you are both consenting adults… I mean now, you guys really could be in a relationship and no one would think all that much of it. My grandma married my grandpa when she was 40 and he was 20. They’ve been married for 38 years now. They knew it was love, and cast aside the judgments of others whose business it really was not. I’m thankful that they did. They couldn’t have lived without one another and they knew it. That was even in a far less progressive time than 16 years ago. But you did what you felt was best, and I respect that!

    Liked by 2 people

      1. That’s lovely! If it isn’t right though, then it’s best not to force it, and good on ya for recognizing that straight away.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. How old were you? My husband was 16 years older than me, my boyfriend before that 20 years older. I’m curious about why you thought age would make such a difference. If you had young children, surely you weren’t that much older than she. Or was it that you knew that you wouldn’t be interested in the long run with someone younger and so you didn’t want to start anything because she was a “nice” girl?

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes.. I think stage of life is more important than age and you were definitely at different stages of life! The difference between 19 and 36 is probably more that the difference between 39 and 56!

        Liked by 1 person

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