Random Thought Diary

My smart phone’s stupid.
It lets me send messages
I immediately regret.


If clumsiness was
An Olympic event,
I might win or not; but,
I would surely
Trip over the finish line.


I went to my first
Narcissists Anonymous meeting last night.
I was irritated as hell:
There were other people there.


I’ve been told that
Real poetry doesn’t rhyme.
And is angry.
And seeks to reform society.
And never uses vowels.
And is accompanied by kazoos.


Because we must avoid errors:
The committee has oversight.
But they missed something important,
Which was an oversight.

The word “oversight” appears to be
Its own opposite:
Both paying close attention to something
and
Completely missing something.

If I misrepresented the word,
I apologize:
It was an oversight.


I grew up near the beach.
Well twenty miles away.
And I only sort of grew up.


People tell me I’m prolific,
But nowhere near as prodigious in output
As spammers.
These people never sleep.
They’re always impressed with my article,
And want to talk to my webmaster.
There’s got to be money in spamming, but
For the life of me,
I can’t figure out what it is,
Unless, maybe, they’re all on
The Devil’s payroll.

(That might be a good name
For a poem, “The Devil’s Payroll”.
I have to remember it.
After I’ve bought a kazoo.)


I love sleeping.
I wish I could do more of it.
As it happens, I’m
More of a carrier:
My conversation puts people to sleep.

Still, sharing things you love
Is a good thing, right?


I was asked last night
If the story I told about
The fourteen year old girl who
Had a crush on me when
I was twenty-two was
A true story.

Yes, it was.

I was also congratulated
On doing the right thing.

Being clueless is not the same
As being noble.

That poem probably
Had vowels in it, anyway…

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